"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. Once you can fake that you've got it made."
--Groucho Marx ...       ... more "Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories."
--John Wilmot ...      ... more "My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
--Joe Weinstein      ... more "I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
--Henny Youngman ...      ... more "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
--Billy Crystal ...      ... more "A woman drove me to drink ... and I didn't even have the courtesy to thank her."
--W.C. Fields ...      ... more "A fool with a plan can outsmart a genius with no plan."
--T. Boone Pickens      ... more

Some things to do
Things for kids to do In the memory of Thomas Ahlburn